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When you lose control (1) (2)
Two years ago, I lost contact with many of my friends, I was not doing well at school, I was not feeling at ease at school and my parents were always fighting because of their divorce. Finally, I decided to change my major and to change my university also. I wanted to prove to my parents that I could do well, I wanted to be perfect: intellectually speaking and physically speaking. That's when troubles began, I started to avoid certain kind of food. Then I would just eat an apple for the day. But when you do that, when you make yourself starve, you reach a point where you are hungry (even if your stomach is smaller than it used to be). So you eat and eat and eat all that you can ind in the kitchen, you make some weird mixes with the different tastes.
After having ate a lot, you feel guilty, weak , a total crap, so you go to the restrooms and you make yourself vomit. I did this:alterning starving/binging and vomiting during a year. I weighed 54 kilos for 1meter 75.
One day, I don't know how but I realized that something was wrong in my life, so I progressively began re-eating but it was the hardest time of my life. I still have conflicts with food: if I take a salad in a restaurant, I'm going to ask for the dressing on the side but I won't even touch it. I still don't eat bread, pasta and rice.
It's an every day fight, but I think that I overcome anorexia and bulimia.
 
 
Tags: anorexia, bulimia, eating-disorders
Posted By: floramischa Posted Today Personal Story
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